e Godforsaken hour in the morning but I’ve packed a notebook and many pens and will take notes so that I can recreate the blissful/horrific *delete as appropriate moments for you all to enjoy/laugh at on my return.Bea has packed several “darling little shift dresses for the evening and a rather stunning bikini”. Charlie has had all of her superfluous hair waxed off of her body and is staying overnight with us. Lou came out of her rehab top-up today and attended a group therapy session entitled “How to Cope in A Crowd”. Janey has issued instructions to Darren and his housemates about “having no parties while I’m away mate or the wedding’s off”. Auntie Ivy has bought an Ibiza travel guide and keeps ringing me and Janey up with little titbits of information that she thinks we’ll find interesting. Sue had a mishapwith the fake tan and is bathing in lemon juice to try and tone the orange tint down.
I didn’t watch the recent programme entitled “Terror in the Skies” by the way. Foolishly, Charlie did. She’s taking miniature bottles of vodka to swig at the boarding gate.
Passport, money and emailed flight confirmation? Check.
Faint sense that I’m abandoning my husband, child and dogs? Check.
Sweets for journey - mints for car journeys, boiled sweets for take off and landing? Check.
Notebook for jotting down blog entries? Check.
Books for burying head into when it all becomes too much? Check.
Suntan cream and aftersun? Check.
Slight fear of plane actually crashing. Check.
Slight fear of Bea becoming hysterical when surrounded by “people who frequent budget airlines darling”. Check.
Above fear mounting alarmingly? Check.
Fears that I’m about to enter a Size Zero hell and spend all day stuffing my face to compensate? Check.
Knowledge that if Janey says just one more time “Ooh, it’s gonna be like Big Brother innit?” I shall hit her. Check.
Camera? Check.
Oh, and suitcase! Check!
Toodle pip my lovely friends!
8 comments:
Hasta la vista, baby! Check.
Can't wait to hear all about it. Have fun!
I hope you have a great time. I can't wait to hear all about it when you come back!
Have a lovely time. Bea sounds too sensible to give into chav hysteria. I'm sure she won't. Or make sure she, too has so much vodka at the check in that she doesn't notice.
Have a fabby time m'dear!
funny, check.
Have a wonderful time, we expect mirth upon your return.
Looking forwards to posting giving full details of adventures overseas! Have a blast, Nunhead Mum.
Nice site, by the way, have added you to my list of favourites.
Enjoy!
Full report awaited...
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