Never ever do the following:
1 Ask an accountant (however lovely, sexy and gorgeous in the bedroom he may be) to lay laminate flooring.
2 Wave your son off to Peckham Rye Park with an Eastern European au-pair and his two cousins WITHOUT packing a change of clothes, snorkel and flippers.
3 Allow a well meaning - but ultimately dippy - neighbour to look after your three dogs (of varying sizes, temperaments and good-behaviour levels) in her house which is decorated in white, creams and what she calls eau-de-nil and has stunning (and delicate/expensive/irreplaceable) knick-knacks - some dating back to her Great-Great-Great-Granny's era.
4 Wake up on a beautiful Saturday morning, with birds chirping away in the garden, your husband in an amourous mood and think "Aah, today will be a fantastic day!"
1 The strips of laminate flooring are not the same size as the room he is laminating and he can't make it fit but is instead bleating about how much it has all cost and doesn't fit.
2 He will take it upon himself to lean so far over the fence at the pond to pick up a strangely shaped stick that he will fall in head first and be unable to doggy paddle because of the gloop.
3 They are canine wrecking balls.
4 Because, if today is anything to go by, it won't be!