Thursday, 6 November 2008

An update update

Queen Bee Mummy doesn’t “really see” our problem. She actually said as much when about ten mummies caught her by the school gates on Monday morning. She didn’t know what we were all worried about when she left 30 children in the care of Malinka the au pair and her alcohol impaired boyfriend. So it was dark! So they’d turned all the lights off and cranked up a selection of horror DVDs and scary music. So Erica was left alone to eat all of the lemon tarts and spent the whole weekend clutching her stomach and groaning. “I really do think you’re all over exaggerating!” Queen Bee Mummy said as she bounced on her ludicrously high heels and fixed us all with her baby blues.

Harumph. I shall be monitoring Mac’s attendance at any future parties, as will Dawn who said the only plus side of the whole thing was that Jonathan is now treating her like a human being and not Evil Stepmother Who Is Evil.

Bea is in love with her new temporary au pair Flavia and is already unable to envision life without her. “As long as she’s not in love with me if you know what I mean. She’s one of them” Bea accompanied this comment with a raised eyebrow but is relieved because said sassy sexy 23 year old Italian curvy momma will not be making eyes at hubby Stephen. Stephen is, apparently, sulking. “She can make pasta. From scratch” Bea continued as we walked around Sainsburys Dulwich last night selecting nibbles for the Bonfire Night party this weekend. Stephen, fed up of standing at the foot of the garden and taking his life into his hands by setting off rockets, has hired a professional firework company to take care of everything. “It’s going to rival the Beijing Olympics closing ceremony!” beamed my lovely sister.

Mac doesn’t like school any more because he didn’t get a Well Done Card for writing his name. “Billy did but it’s not fair mummy”. Somehow I think it’s my fault for giving him a long name with the last letter of the alphabet in it. In fact, I know it’s my fault. Talking of names, the newest arrival has already had his rather majestic name (Frederick) reduced to Freddie, Fred, Freds, Fred-Fred, Freddie Cupcake and Frodo. The last name is from his devoted father who thinks it’s hilarious. The boy himself is wondering what the hell he’s got himself into, with a father who is reduced to tears of mirth every five minutes and a mother who keeps checking his breathing.

Marjorie Stewart has emptied the Christmas department of both Harrods and Selfridges. She was excitedly telling Mac this afternoon about the inflatable santa, sleigh and reindeer she’s got for her roof when he stopped her by raising a hand. “If you put it on the roof, how is Santa going to land?” he asked. She looked at me. I ignored her. “Well, he doesn’t land on my roof, but he’ll land on yours” she reassured him. “Will there be room?” he asked, peering up at our adjacent roofing area. This concern developed into teatime when he wanted me to go up and measure the roof to see if it’s big enough. “If it won’t fit she can’t do it mummy” he said as he sipped on his peppermint tea. “I mean it” he added, a touch of steel in his voice. On Monday we all received a letter from the head teacher informing us that this term would be about “letting the children find their own individual spirit and voice and allowing them to make their own decisions and put forward valid arguments for these decisions”.

Four days in and it’s working already.


aims said...


I'd be up measuring the roof too! I mean if Santa or the Hogfather were unable to land...well and life as we know it might never be the same. I for one know that the sun wouldn't rise the next get up there!


rosiero said...

Well, I think in such cases, he parks on the pavement.

Millennium Housewife said...

LOL at all three of the last posts, excellent. Although Husband now suspects I may be reading blogs rather than 'working' due to periods of laughter. 'Working' rarely produces such mirth he suggested with a sternly raised eyebrow and a half turn from the football.

Anonymous said...

Won't the inflatables blow off?

They would at my house!

CJ xx

cxfwxcdsaf said...

sed trimming with white topstitching adds richness to its totality and also makes it seem informal; while the very silver tone hardware also gave it a touch of sumptuousness.

This Louis Vuitton Monogram Mini Lin might be opened as a result of a zip along the very top and would show nylon lining with an inside zipped pocket. Its form seems fascinating and is sized sufficient at 12 x 9 x 7 inches. This would absolutely be quite easy to carry either as a result of the very adjustable double handles of 3? to 5 inches drop or as a result of the very adjustable shoulder strap of 20 inches drop.

Any of your informal clothing, be it a denim with a cute tee or just a simple day dress, would absolutely complete a simple yet luscious seem with this Todstag heuer watches|

2010 Wedding Dresses said...

thanks for your sharing! great helpful!!!Thank you
Louboutin Shoes 
Christian Louboutin Shoes
Christian Louboutin Pumps 
Christian Louboutin Boots 
Christian Louboutin Pumps
Christian Louboutin Heels 
Christian Louboutin Sandal
Pigalle Christian Louboutin 
christian louboutin studded bow
halter neck wedding dresses
louboutin pink bow studded heels
christian louboutin fur boots
loubitan studded bow peep
christian louboutin studded bow peep-toes
christian louboutin studded heels with bow
christian louboutin white shoes with bow
Wedding Dress Shops
vintage wedding dresses 
wedding dresses
cheap mobile phone
Wedding Dress Shops
Wedding Dresses 2011
Wedding Dress Shops
Off the Shoulder Wedding Dresses
bridal jackets
wedding jackets for the bride
loubitan studded bow peep
bridal jackets
wedding jackets for the bride
halter neck wedding dresses

All about me

My photo
Nunhead, London, United Kingdom
I'm a mum of one, wife of one and owner to several dogs, a variety of breeds and sizes. I live in the up and coming area (or so they say) of Nunhead and have mad neighbours, strange friends and certifiable relatives. I shop locally, although I do defect to Sainsburys once a week - shoot me now local shopkeepers.